Gods and Demigods Read the Lightning Thief
by LeslieeeCx
Summary: Join the gods and demigods on an adventure...to the past! Reading the books? Boring! Or so it seems. Read, as secrets become uncovered, relationships blossom, reunions and most importantly? BLACKMAIL.
1. Prologue

**Warning: This will be like a lot of other "Demigods and Gods read the Lightning Thief" ect and VERY cliche [Bright light, demigods filled room,] and pun-y and stuff, [e.g. Zeus thundered,] and I know there's a lot of fanfictions like this... **

**Disclaimer: Le character and books- Rick Riordan/ Idea of the gods and demigods read thingy- The person who invented it (seriously, give them a cookie) and plot- Mostly me, but ideas from other fanfictions too. **

**Third Person's POV [Olympus, year 2000]**

It was a regular day at Olympus, now you'd think for 14 superhuman beings, they'd at least be civilized, right?

"Stop being so dramatic, brother. They should have made you God of the Theater."

"TASTE ME MASTERBOLT!"

"Oh. My. Us. THEY HAVE THE NEW LATEST PRADA SHOES! *squee*"

"Stop cheating on me, Zeus!"

"GIVE BACK MY SCREWDRIVER HERMES."

"Hey, lil' sis, do you think I can-"

"DO NOT CALL ME LITTLE SIS OR I WILL KILL YOU."

"Olives were SO much better then your saltwater spring!"

"Shut up, Owl Face. I thought-"

Suddenly, the ground started shaking. Everything was dark for a second until someone said,

"Seriously? Smoke bombs?" A voice coughed.

There stood eight demigods. They were all very different, the oldest was about a 17 year old girl. There were four girls, and four boys.

The oldest girl had blonde, princess girls and calculating grey eyes.

One was about 15, with spiky black hair, electrifying blue eyes and a silver circlet that symbolized a huntress of Artemis.

Another had light brown hair, and piercing green eyes.

The last was a buff girl, with stringy brown hair and small, brown eyes.

Out of the boys, there was a boy who was about 14, with black hair, black eyes, black everything except for the unusually pale skin.

There were two brothers, who looked identical. They both had elfish features, brown hair and blue eyes. They looked like pranksters.

The last boy was similar too the two brothers, but more calm and not so much "Gimme your money and I'll made very good use of it" like the brothers.

"WHO DARES TO INTERRUPT-" Zeus thundered.

"It doesn't look like we were interrupting much." The large girl snorted.

"HOW DARE YOU SPEAK-"

"How dare us? How dare US? How dare you! You-" The huntress snarled.

"-Had the nerve to close off Olympus-" The pale boy continued.

"-Especially when HE'S missing-" The taller prankster said.

"-How dare you wipe his memory-" The blonde interrupted.

"-I cannot believe you did that-" The shorted twin exclaimed.

"-Eight months! Are you-"

"Kidding me? You ditched-"

"-Us right when we needed you-"

The gods were appalled that mere mortals spoke to them with that tone.

"I WILL BLAST YOU! I AM-"

"A drama queen." The pale boy muttered.

Before Zeus could blast the group of demigods, a note popped into existence right in front of Zeus' face and stuck. He peeled it off and it read;

_Dear very angry demigods, and gods._

_We sent you back in time, to read a book. You'll recieve it after you're done with this note. We may bring in other people further into the story. Um...Nico, Thalia, Annabeth, HE'S fine, we'll bring him in later. Don't kill anyone, fighting is okay. [This goes for you , Thalia, Nico, when HE'S arrives.] _

_K that's about it for now, _

_Peace out,_

_The Fates _

All of the demigods breathed a sigh of relief.

"Peace out? Really? Wow, and I thought the smoke bombs were bad enough." The pale boy snickered.

"Introduce yourselves!" Zeus boomed.

"Just name and parentage, since we don't want to give any spoilers." Hestia suggested.

"Okay, Annabeth Chase, daughter of Athena." Said the blonde. Athena looked smug.

"Nico Di Angelo, son of Hades born before the oath." Said the pale boy. Zeus huffed but said nothing.

"Thalia Grace, daughter of Zeus." Hera glared at her, while everyone else returned the glare.

"Katie Gardner, daughter of Demeter." Demeter smiled.

"Clarrise La Rue, daughter of Ares." Said God smirked.

"I'm Travis," Said the shorter brother,

"And that's Connor," The taller one continued.

"And we're the SOLLS!"

"Sons-"

"Of-"

"Hermes!" They finished together.

"No, you're Connor, and you're Travis." Katie said, pointing at the shorter one first, then the taller one. Hermes nodded in their direction.

"Chris Rodriguez, son of Hermes." Hermes also nodded at him.

"That's everyone...so where are the book?" Athena asked.

Just then, a single book fell from the sky and hit Zeus. "OWWW!"

"Who wants to read first?" Hestia asked?

"I will, Lady Hestia." Said Annabeth, who was reaching for the books.

"Do we sit or stand? Or..." Nico trailed off, as Aphrodite made couches for everyone.

Annabeth took one look at the book and started shaking. Thalia reached out and took the book. She gasped.

"**P-Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief**."

All of the demigods gasped, and some shoulders started to shake. Trembling, Thalia asked,

"Can someone else read?"

"I will, Thalia." Artemis said.

"**Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief**," Artemis started.

Poseidon flinched, alothough no one except the demigods noticed.

"**Chapter 1, I Accidentally Vaporize My Pre-Algebra Teacher**."

* * *

><p><strong>Almost 1,000 words. Ehh I know this is so overdone, but I enjoy reading these so yeah. I thought one more couldn't hurt, could it? xD Psh. if I can make it through the first one. Question of the day: Who's your favourite Percy Jackson character? It can be from any of the books, HoO or PJO.<strong>

**~LeslieeeCx**


	2. Accidentally Vaporizing Teachers

**"I Accidentally Vaporize My Pre-Algebra Teacher." **Artemis started.

"Woah, how do you do that? I have a few people in mind who needs Vaporizing..." Trailed Nico.

**Look, I didn't want to be a half-blood.**

"I feel ya, bro." Said Travis.

"Me too." Agreed Connor.

**If you think you might be one, my advice is:**

"Holy guacamole, duck and cover!" Thalia said, the same time Nico said

"Run for your life!"

"Perce's giving advice!" They said in unison.

**Close this book right now. **

"Okay." Said Travis. He walked over to Artemis and close the book.

"Boys." Artemis snorted, flipping to the right page.

**Believe whatever lie your mom or dad told you about your birth, and try to lead a normal life. **

"Not gonna work, Prissy." Clarisse said.

**Being a half-blood is dangerous. **

"Yep." Said all the demigods.

**It's scary.**

"Yep." They said, again.

**Most of the time, it gets you killed in painful, nasty ways. **

This time, no one said 'yep' They were too busy mourning for the loss of a sibling or a friend.

_Do they really have it so bad? _The gods thought.

**If you're a normal kid, read this because you think it's fiction, great. Read on. I envy you for being able to believe none of this has ever happened. **

"Why would a mortal be reading this, anyway?" Asked Chris.

"I have no idea." Annabeth said.

"Gasp! Annabeth doesn't know something!"

A dagger pinned the wall beside Nico.

"Don't you ever dare..."

"Wait, Death Breath, did you seriously say 'gasp' instead of actually gasping?" Asked Thalia, smirking.

"Shut up." Nico grumbled.

**But if you recognize yourself in these pages- if you feel something stirring inside- **

"You know, my stomach feels kind of weird..." Said Apollo.

"Apollo, I think Percy was talking about demigods. You knew you were a god ever since you were born, and also that's because you ate all of Zeus' cupcakes." Hera scolded.

"APOLLO DID WHAT?!" An enraged Zeus shouted.

"I did NOT eat all your cupcakes! I swear..." Started Apollo. "I only ate most of them and stole your secret stash of Gummy bears."

"No! MY GUMMY BEARS!" Zeus cried, anguished.

"You have a secret stash of Gummy Bears?" Cried Hera and Hermes, for different reasons. Hera being the strict goddess of families that she is, and Hermes for wanting to steal them.

"Yeah..." Zeus said. "Or at least I used to."

No one noticed Travis and Connor secretly opening a bag of Gummy Bears.

"Hey, want some?" They asked the demigods.

**Stop reading immediately. You might be one of us. And once you know that, it's only a matter of time before**_** they **_**sense it too and they'll come for you.**

"He makes it sound like the FBI is after you..." Nico muttered.

"Who's they?" Asked Ares, clueless.

"The monsters, you idiot!" Said Artemis.

**Don't say I didn't warn you. **

"You didn't warn-" Started Nico, Travis, Connor, and Thalia.

"Nico, he was kind of busy saving you from your V.P. Travis, Connor, I believe you were at camp before him, and Thalia, you were kind of a tree." Annabeth said.

"But he still didn't warn-"

"Please read, Lady Artemis." Katie rushed.

**My name is Percy Jackson. **

"No, it's Kelp for brains..." Said Thalia.

"No, it's Aqua Man!" Shouted Nico.

"No, it's Perce!" Said Connor and Travis in unison.

"Camper Boy!"

"Captain Salt Water!"

"Peter Johnson!"

"Perrie!"

"Prissy!"

"No, you're all wrong! It's Seaweed Brain. Duh."

After a moment, everyone nodded in agreement.

"Do you know this boy?" Asked Hephaestus.

"No, we don't know him. He's only the guy who saved the world a couple of times..." Said Clarisse, sarcasticly.

_Percy Jackson? As in, my son, Percy Jackson? _Poseidon thought.

The gods looked shocked.

**I'm twelve years old. Until a few months ago, I was a boarding student at Yancy Academy, a private school for troubled kids in upstate New York.**

**Am I a troubled kid? **

"Yeah!" Exclaimed the demigods, except for Clarisse, with Nico and Thalia being the loudest, while Clarisse said,

"Hell yeah, Prissy!"

"Language!" Shouted Apollo.

Clarisse glared.

**Yeah, you can say that. **

"He admits it! He admits it! He's past the stage of denial!" Shouted Nico gleefully.

"Nico?" Asked Thalia.

"Yeah?"

"Who gave you coffee?"

"Shut up."

**I could start at any point in my short, miserable life to prove it, but things really started going bad last May, when our 6th grade class took a field trip to Manhattan- twently eight mental caged kids and two teacher on a yellow school bus, heading towards the Metropolitan Museum of Arts to look at Ancient Greek and Roman stuff. **

"What fun!" Athena sqealed.

"No, it sounds like touture!" Shouted the immature gods and demigods. (Hermes, Apollo, Ares, Nico, and the Stoll brothers)

**I know- it sounds like touture. Most Yancy field trips are. **

"What?" Shouted Athena, raged.

"Gah! Attack of the Jackson Syndrome! Call a doctor!" cried Thalia.

**But Mr. Brunner, our latin teacher was leading this trip, so I had hopes. **

_Brunner? Isn't that what Percy called Chiron when he first saw him? _Annabeth thought.

**Mr. Brunner was this middle-aged guy in a motorized wheelchair-**

"Awesome!" cried the Stolls.

**He had thinning hair and a scruffy beard and a frayed tweed jacket, which always smelled like coffee. You wouldn't think he'd be cool, but he told stories and jokes, and let us play games in class. He also had this awesome collection of Roman armor and weapons, so he was the only teacher whose class didn't put me to sleep. **

"The boy sleeps in class?! How dare he?"

You can guess who said that.

"Imagine what would happen if she found our her daughter was dating this kid." Snickered Nico, loud enough for only the demigods to hear.

"You shouldn't be calling him kid," Said Clarisse.

"You're younger than him..." Continued Chris.

"_EX-CUSEEE ME?!_" Nico shouted, in a fake, pitchy voice. "I am older!"

The others snorted.

"The nerve of the youngsters, these days!"

The gods were confused by his statement.

**I hoped the trip would be okay. At least, I hoped that for once II wouldn't get into trouble.**

"Please, trouble follows you like a magnet." Laughed Annabeth.

**Boy was I wrong. **

**See, bad things happen to me-**

"Understatement." sang Katie.

**on field trips. Like at my fifth-grade school, when we went to the Saratoga Battlefield I had this accident with a Revolutionary War cannon. I wasn't aiming for the school bus, but of course I got expelled anyway. **

"Is this kid mine?" Hermes snickered.

The demigods were too busy laughing to answer.

**And before that, at my fourth-grade school, when we took a behind-the-scenes tour of the Marine World shark pool, I sort of hit the wrong lever on the catwalk and our class took an unplanned swim. **

"Oh...My...Gods..." Nico magaged to choke out.

**And the time before that...well, you get the idea. **

"No, we don't..." said Apollo innocently.

"Boys," Artemis snorted.

**This trip, I was determined to be good. **

"Riighhhtt," drawled Travis.

**All the way into the city, I put up with Nancy Bobofit, the freckly, redheaded kleptomaniac girl, hitting my best friend Grover in the back of the head with chunks of peanut butter-and-ketchup sandwich. **

"Ewww!" Squeaked Aphrodite.

"Why, I oughta..." Raged Nico.

"I'm too busy pummeling Nancy in my mind to make fun of you for saying 'oughta'." Snarled Thalia.

"I'll join you, Thals." Said Annabeth, through gritted teeth.

Everyone else who knew Grover glared at the book.

The gods look scared. Who knew their children were so scary?

**Grover was an easy target. He was scrawny. He cried when he got frustrated. He must've been held back several grades, because he was the only sixth grader with acne and the start of a wispy beard on his chin. On top of all that, he was crippled. He had a note excusing him from PE for the rest of his life because he had some kind of muscular disease in his legs. He walked funny, like every step hurt him, **

"I'm sure Grover would love that description..." Snickered Thalia, but not forgetting Nancy.

**but don't let that fool you. You should've seen him run when it was enchilada day in the cafeteria. **

"Satyrs," sighed Dionysus.

"You were listening?" Cried the demigods, and the gods.

"Grovanna always loved enchiladas..." Said Dionysus fondly.

"What?" He snapped, when the others were looking at him like he'd grown two heads.

**Anyway, Nancy Bobofit was throwing wads of sandwich that stuck in his curly brown hair, and she knew I couldn't do anything back to her because I was already on probation. The headmaster had threatened me with death-**

"WHAT?"

"Is that even legal?" Asked Apollo.

"No, you dimwit!" Cried Artemis.

"You know you love me little sis." Smirked Apollo.

Instantly, an arrow impaled itself in the space where Apollo's head should have been a second ago.

All was silent, except for a 'CRUCH' coming from Ares.

All eyes were on Ares, who was munching on a bag of popcorn.

Hepheastus sighed, and all the females rolled their eyes.

**by in-school suspension if anything bad, embarrassing, or even mildly entertaining happened on this trip.**

"Oh."

"Well then."

"Knowing Percy, something "mildly entertaining" will happen."

**"I'm going to kill her," I mumbled.**

"DO IT!" Shouted the demigods, and surprisingly Ares.

"Bloodshed," Ares said, rubbing his hands together.

**Grover tried to calm me down. "It's okay. I like peanut butter."**

"To eat!" Exclaimed Hera.

**He dodged another piece of Nancy's lunch.**

**"That's it." I started to get up, but Grover pulled me back to my seat.**

"Awww..." Whined Ares.

**"You're already on probation," he reminded me. "You know who'll get blamed if anything happens." Looking back on it, I wish I'd decked Nancy Bobofit right then and there. In-school suspension would've been nothing compared to the mess I was about to get myself into.**

Poseidon squirmed in his seat.

**Mr. Brunner led the museum tour.**

**He rode up front in his wheelchair, guiding us through the big echoey gall eries, past marble statues and glass cases full of really old black-and-orange pottery.**

**It blew my mind that this stuff had survived for two thousand, three thousand years.**

**He gathered us around a thirteen-foot-tall stone column with a big sphinx-**

"Hate them." Muttered Annabeth

**on the top, and started telling us how it was a grave marker, a stele, for a girl about our age. He told us about the carvings on the sides. I was trying to listen to what he had to say, because it was kind of interesting,**

"Gasp! Oh no! We lost Percy!" The Stoll brothers cried.

Katie whacked them both on the head.

"Owww...Katie-Kat, that hurt!" Travis complained.

**but everybody around me was talking, and every time I told them to shut up, the other teacher chaperone, Mrs. Dodds, would give me the evil eye.**

"Mrs. Dodds?" Asked Hades.

"Crap." Said Nico. He had known Mrs. Dodds was Alecto.

**Mrs. Dodds was this little math teacher from Georgia who always wore a black leather jacket, even though she was fifty years old. She looked mean enough to ride a Harley right into your locker. She had come to Yancy halfway through the year, when our last math teacher had a nervous breakdown.**

"Nervous breakdown." Snorted Clarisse.

**From her first day, Mrs. Dodds loved Nancy Bobofit and figured I was devil spawn.**

"Hey, that's Nico!" Shouted Thalia.

"No, those are the gods. The older ones, anyways." Said Nico.

"Hey!" The gods shouted.

"Well, that's true..." Said the children of Kronos.

**She would point her crooked finger at me and say, "Now, honey," real sweet, and I knew I was going to get after-school detention for a month.**

**One time, after she'd made me erase answers out of old math workbooks until midnight,**

"Is that even legal?" Asked Apollo, for the second time.

"Monster?" Asked Poseidon nervously.

All the demigods nodded. They knew Alecto was Percy's first monster.

**I told Grover I didn't think Mrs. Dodds was human.**

**He looked at me, real serious, and said, "You're absolutely right."**

"Grover!" Nico, Thalia, and Annabeth scolded.

"You're talking to a book." Said Chris.

"Maybe if this Grover ate more cereal..." Said Demeter, thoughtfully.

**Mr. Brunner kept talking about Greek funeral art.**

**Finally, Nancy Bobofit snickered something about the naked guy on the stele, and I turned around and said, "Will you shut up?"**

"Knowing Percy, it came out louder than it should have." Said Annabeth.

**It came out louder than I meant it to.**

The demigods laughed.

**The whole group laughed. Mr. Brunner stopped his story.**

**"Mr. Jackson," he said, "did you have a comment?"**

**My face was totally red. I said, "No, sir."**

"You obviously did!" Said Travis.

"No sir!" Said Connor in a high pitched girly voice.

**Mr. Brunner pointed to one of the pictures on the stele. "Perhaps you'll tell us what this picture represents?" I looked at the carving, and-**

"Ten drachmas he'll get it wrong..." Said Zeus.

"You're on." Said Poseidon.

**felt a flush of relief, because I actually recognized it.**

"That's a first!" Said Clarisse.

**"That's Kronos eating his kids, right?"**

"Anything but that one, Chiron." Groaned the gods that were swallowed by Kronos.

"Pay up, Zeus!"

**"Yes," Mr. Brunner said, obviously not satisfied. "And he did this because …"**

**"Well …" I racked my brain to remember.**

"Don't hurt yourself!" Joked Chris.

**"Kronos was the king god, and-"**

"GOD?!" Zeus roared.

**"God?" Mr. Brunner asked.**

"Attack of the Chiron Syndrome." Said Connor, deadpanned, sending the demigods into giggles.

**"Titan," I corrected myself. "And … he didn't trust his kids, who were the gods. So, um, Kronos ate them, right? But his wife hid baby Zeus, and gave Kronos a rock to eat instead. And later, when Zeus grew up, he tricked his dad, Kronos, into barfing up his brothers and sisters-"**

**"Eeew!" said one of the girls behind me.**

"Eeew? Imagine living in that!" Cried Hades.

"I know right! It took me weeks just to catch up on the lastest gossip!" Shrieked Hermes in a really girly voice.

"Totally!" Agreed Aphrodite wholeheartedly, not realizing the sarcasm in his words.

"Hermes, Aphrodite, you were born AFTER Kronos spit us out." Said Hera.

"Still. His statement was, like, so totally true." Complained Aphrodite.

"Wait. How did Kronos mistake dad for a rock?" Asked Thalia.

"Well, you see, your father looks like a rock." Said Poseidon.

"And he's as dense as one too!" Added Hades.

"Good one, Uncle P, Uncle H!" Said Apollo.

The demigods snickered.

**"-and so there was this big fight between the gods and the Titans," I continued, "and the gods won."**

"Did he just..." Athena asked.

"Yeah..." Said Hermes.

"That's Percy for you!" Said Nico and Thalia.

"JINX!"

"DOUBLE JINX!"

"TRIPLE JINX!"

"QUADRIPLE JINX!"

"OH MY GODS NICO LOOK OVER THERE!" Thalia said, pointing to a corner to the left.

"Where?"

"JINX!"

"No fair! Pinecone face, you can't- Mpphhffmmmp!"

Thalia smirked, holding up a role of duct tape.

**Some snickers from the group. Behind me, Nancy Bobofit mumbled to a friend, "Like we're going to use this in real life. Like it's going to say on our job applications,****'Please explain why Kronos ate his kids.'"**

**"And why, Mr. Jackson," Brunner said, "to paraphrase Miss Bobofit's excellent question, does this matter in real life?" **

"BUSTED!" Cried Apollo, Hermes, the Stolls and Nico. Well, Nico said something more like 'Mpphhhfpphfffmm!"

"JINX!" Said the four.

"DOUBLE JINX!"

"TRIP-"

"Please read, Lady Artemis," Katie rushed.

**"Busted," Grover muttered.**

Apollo, Hermes, Connor, Travis and Nico looked apalled.

"NO! I THINK LIKE A GOAT!" wailed Hermes and Apollo,

While the Stolls said "NO! OUR GROVER SYNDROME IS GETTING WORSE!"

The four looked at each other again and smirked.

"JINX!"

"DOUBLE JINX!"

"TRIPLE JI-"

"Shut up, I'm trying to read." Hissed Artemis.

**"Shut up," Nancy hissed, her face even brighter red than her hair.**

**At least Nancy got packed, too. Mr. Brunner was the only one who ever caught her saying anything wrong. He had radar ears. **

"Horse ears." Muttered Travis.

"Ruined such good pranks!" Connor fake wept.

**I thought about his question, and shrugged. "I don't know, sir."**

"Typical Percy answer..." Laughed Katie

**"I see." Mr. Brunner looked disappointed. "Well, half credit, Mr. Jackson. Zeus did indeed feed Kronos a mixture of mustard and wine,**

"How did he even think of mustard and wine?" Asked Hera.

**which made him disgorge his other five children, who, of course, being immortal gods, had been living and growing up completely undigested in the Titan's stomach. The gods defeated their father, sliced him to pieces with his own scythe, and scattered his remains in Tartarus, the darkest part of the Underworld. On that happy note, it's time for lunch. Mrs. Dodds, would you lead us back outside?"**

"How is that a happy note?" Asked Poseidon.

"Chiron really needs to work on his subject changing."

**The class drifted off, the girls holding their stomachs, the guys pushing each other around and acting like doofuses.**

"Don't they always?" Asked Artemis.

Thalia shook her head. "You think this hero is different from the others, my lady."

Poseidon was radiating pride. _Artemis actually approves of a boy; his son. _He thought.

**Grover and I were about to follow when Mr. Brunner said, "Mr. Jackson."**

**I knew that was coming.**

"Are you physic?" Gasped Travis.

Needless to say, he got whacked in the head by Katie.

**I told Grover to keep going. Then I turned toward Mr. Brunner. "Sir?"**

**Mr. Brunner had this look that wouldn't let you go- intense brown eyes that could've been a thousand years old and had seen everything.**

"Observant." Athena prasied.

Everyone gaped at the said goddess.

"What? I can praise someone, once in a while." She huffed.

**"You must learn the answer to my question," Mr. Brunner told me.**

"About...?" Asked Nico.

**"About the Titans?"**

**"About real life. And how your studies apply to it."**

"Oh."

**"Oh."**

"Typical Percy answer number two." Said Thalia.

"Hey!" Pouted Nico.

"Wait. Nico. What was the last thing that you said?" Travis smiled evily.

"The last thing I said was oh..."

"Noo! Our little cousin!" Thalia fake wept.

"What?" Asked Nico, cluelessly.

"I'm so sorry, Zombie Dude..." Said Connor.

"I'm afraid this is incurable..." Said Clarisse, catching on.

Katie gave a small smile and said, "We have lost you to..."

"The rare and deadly disease, of Percy Syndome." Finished Chris.

The gods were watching this act in amusement, while the demigods cracked up. Except for Nico. He was pouting.

"Hey!" He exclaimed.

** "What you learn from me," he said, "is vitally important. I expect you to treat it as such. I will accept only the best from you, Percy Jackson." I wanted to get angry, this guy pushed me so hard.**

"For a good reason!"

**I mean, sure, it was kind of cool on tournament days, when he dressed up in a suit of Roman armor**

"Roman?" Asked Annabeth. The gods shifted in their seats and Athena looked ready to murder someone. This did not go unoticed by the demigods.

**and shouted: "What ho!"**

"What ho?" Ares snorted.

**and challenged us, sword-point against chalk, to run to the board and name every Greek and Roman person who had ever lived, and their mother, and what god they worshiped.**

Travis and Connor looked scandalized. Sure, Chiron was awesome but even THAT was too challenging for Athena. As if Athena read their mind, she exclaimed,

"Even I can't do that!"

"Mark it down," Poseidon whispered to Hermes and Apollo. "It's not everyday when Owl Face can't do something."

Hermes and Apollo chuckled.

**But Mr. Brunner expected me to be as good as everybody else, despite the fact that I have dyslexia and attention deficit disorder ****and I had never made above a C- in my life. No-he didn't expect me to be as good; he expected me to be better. And I just couldn't learn all those names and facts, much less spell them correctly. **

"I can." Said Annabeth.

"Well we can't!" Exclaimed the others.

**I mumbled something about trying harder, while Mr. Brunner took one long sad look at the stele, like he'd been at this girl's funeral.**

"Probably was."

**He told me to go outside and eat my lunch.**

**The class gathered on the front steps of the museum, where we could watch the foot traffic along Fifth Avenue.**

**Overhead, a huge storm was brewing, with clouds blacker than I'd ever seen over the city.**

"What are you two fighting about now?" Asked Hera.

The demigods shifted in their seats. Zeus isn't going to be happy when he finds out someone stole his lightning bolt.

**I figured maybe it was global warming or something, because the weather all across New York state had been weird since Christmas. We'd had massive snow storms, flooding, wildfires from lightning strikes. I wouldn't have been surprised if this was a hurricane blowing in. **

"Okay, this must be very serious if they're fighting for a long time." Said Athena, seriously.

**Nobody else seemed to notice. Some of the guys were pelting pigeons with Lunchables crackers.**

"Boys..." Muttered Artemis and Thalia.

Artemis smiled at Thalia, already figuring out that she was her new lieutenant. Then she frowned. What happened to Zoe?*

**Nancy Bobofit was trying to pickpocket something from a lady's purse,**

**Everyone looked at Hermes. **

"I don't have a child named Nancy..." He frowned. "It's not always my child even if they're into thievery."

"Well, you are the God of Thieves..."

"Fair point."

**and, of course, Mrs. Dodds wasn't seeing a thing.**

"Monster?" Asked Poseidon, worriedly.

"Yeah," Annabeth nodded.

**Grover and I sat on the edge of the fountain, away from the others. We thought that maybe if we did that, everybody wouldn't know we were from that school-the school for loser freaks who couldn't make it elsewhere.**

"I'm guessing it didn't work..." Said Chris.

**"Detention?" Grover asked.**

**"Nah," I said. "Not from Brunner. I just wish he'd lay off me sometimes. I mean-I'm not a genius."**

"Understatement of the century." Said the demigods, under their breath.

**Grover didn't say anything for a while. Then, when I thought he was going to give me some deep philosophical comment to make me feel better, he said, "Can I have your apple?"**

"Grover!" Annabeth and Thalia facepalmed.

"That seems like something he'd do, though." Said Nico.

**I didn't have much of an appetite, so I let him take it.**

"Gasp! Percy, not hungry?" Cried Annabeth.

"You too, Annie?" Smirked Connor.

Connor shut up when Annabeth started playing with her dagger.

**I watched the stream of cabs going down Fifth Avenue, and thought about my mom's apartment, only a little ways uptown from where we sat. I hadn't seen her since Christmas. I wanted so bad to jump in a taxi and head home.**

"Mama's boy." Coughed Ares.

"Says you. You still live with your mom!" Smirked Nico.

"Ohh! Burn!" Cried Travis.

The gods snickered. Ares got told off by a demigod.

**She'd hug me and be glad to see me, but she'd be disappointed, too. She'd send me right back to Yancy, remind me that I had to try harder, even if this was my sixth school in six years and I was probably going to be kicked out again.**

"So pessimistic..." Muttered Katie.

"You sir, are a ray of sunshine." Laughed Chris.

"I am literally sunshine." Said Apollo.

"Oh, the irony..." Said Travis.

**I wouldn't be able to stand that sad look she'd give me.**

**Mr. Brunner parked his wheelchair at the base of the handicapped ramp. He ate celery while he read a paperback novel. A red umbrella stuck up from the back of his chair, making it look like a motorized cafe table.**

"Cool!" Shouted Connor, Travis, Apollo and Hermes.

"I made that, you know." Said Hephaestus.

"Oohh! Make me one please." Begged Apollo.

**I was about to unwrap my sandwich when Nancy Bobofit appeared in front of me with her ugly friends-I guess she'd gotten tired of stealing from the tourists-and dumped her half-eaten lunch in Grover's lap.**

"The nerve of that girl!" Said Annabeth, through clenched teeth.

Everyone who knew grover were muttering colorful words under their breath. This time, no one bothered the scold them.

**"Oops." She grinned at me with her crooked teeth. Her freckles were orange, as if somebody had spray-painted her face with liquid Cheetos.**

"Eww!" Squeaked Aphrodite.

"Liquid Cheetos?" Snorted Thalia.

"Prissy's descriptions are too descriptive..." Said Clarisse.

**I tried to stay cool. The school counselor had told me a million times, "Count to ten, get control of your temper." But I was so mad my mind went blank. A wave roared in my ears.**

Cue glances at Poseidon.

**I don't remember touching her, but the next thing I knew, Nancy was sitting on her butt in the fountain, screaming, "Percy pushed me!" Mrs. Dodds materialized next to us.**

Poseidon paled, ignoring the glances of the other gods.

**Some of the kids were whispering: "Did you see-"**

**"-the water-"**

**"-like it grabbed her-"**

"Poseidon!" Roared Zeus.

"Brother, did you break the oath?" Question Hades.

"Yes, Percy Jackson is my son. But you can't say anything about it, you have Thalia, don't you?" Replied Poseidon.

"And Jason..." Muttered Thalia, thankfully no one heard her.

Zeus was probably thinking the same thing as Thalia, so he let the subject drop.

"But if he does anything wrong..." He let that threat hanging.

"Drama Queen..." Coughed Poseidon to Hades.

In a professional voice, Connor and Travis said, "Please apply ice to the burn."

Sending everyone in giggles, except for Zeus, previous matter forgotten.

**I didn't know what they were talking about. All I knew was that I was in trouble again.**

"When are you not?" Asked Katie.

Poseidon paled.

**As soon as Mrs. Dodds was sure poor little Nancy was okay,**

"Poor little Nancy my a-" Said Clarisse, before being cut off by Chris.

"Shh! We have children here..." He said, pointing at Nico.

"I am older than all of you!" Nico exclaimed.

"Riighhht..." Snorted Connor.

"Hey, remember your dolls?" Snickered Thalia.

"They're not dolls! They're action figures." Said Nico. Then, he blushed.

**Promising to get her a new shirt at the museum gift shop, etc., etc., Mrs. Dodds turned on me. There was a triumphant fire in her eyes, as if I'd done something she'd been waiting for all semester.**

"He probably did." Said Annabeth.

**"Now, honey-"**

"Oh. My. Gods. Drop the honey act, please! I've heard enough to last a lifetime." Said Nico. No one really payed attention to how he phrased it, like he seen 'Mrs. Dodds' before, other than Thalia, who has faced Alecto too.

**"I know," I grumbled. "A month erasing workbooks."**

"No! Don't! Never guess your punishment!" Exclaimed Hermes.

"That's rule number 14!" Chorused Chris, Travis and Connor.

**That wasn't the right thing to say.**

"No duh!"

Katie whacked Travis and Connor, while Clarisse whacked Chris.

"Ow!"

**"Come with me," Mrs. Dodds said.**

"No! She's a monster, you Kelp Head!" Screamed Thalia.

"You're talking to a book, Thals." Laughed Annabeth.

Thalia pouted, though she was glad she wasn't mourning over the disappearance of Percy Jackson.

**"Wait!" Grover yelped. "It was me. I pushed her."**

"Brave." Complimented Athena.

**I stared at him, stunned. I couldn't believe he was trying to cover for me. Mrs. Dodds scared Grover to death.**

Hades and Nico perked up at the mention of death, but Nico frowned when Grover was mentioned.

**She glared at him so hard his whiskery chin trembled.**

**"I don't think so, Mr. Underwood," she said.**

**"But-"**

**"You-will-stay-here."**

**Grover looked at me desperately.**

**"It's okay, man," I told him. "Thanks for trying."**

"No! It's not okay!" Poseidon moaned.

"Percy's about to get pummeled." Said Ares, with a maniacal glint in his eyes.

**"Honey," Mrs. Dodds barked at me. "Now."**

**Nancy Bobofit smirked.**

**I gave her my deluxe I'lll-kill-you-later stare.**

"Scary stuff." The demigods, except for Annabeth shuddered.

**Then I turned to face Mrs. Dodds, but she wasn't there. She was standing at the museum entrance, way at the top of the steps, gesturing impatiently at me to come on.**

**How'd she get there so fast?**

"I thought we established this already. It's a monster, Perce." Said Chris jokingly.

**I have moments like that a lot, when my brain falls asleep or something, and the next thing I know I've missed something, as if a puzzle piece fell out of the universe and left me staring at the blank place behind it. The school counselor told me this was part of the ADHD, my brain misinterpreting things.**

"It's not..."

**I wasn't so sure.**

"You should follow your instinct." Lectured Athena.

**I went after Mrs. Dodds.**

"No!"

**Halfway up the steps, I glanced back at Grover. He was looking pale, cutting his eyes between me and Mr. Brunner, like he wanted Mr.****Brunner to notice what was going on, but Mr. Brunner was absorbed in his novel.**

"Chirion!" Cried the demigods, and Poseidon.

"Grover, go get Chirion!" Said Poseidon, sweating bullets.

**I looked back up. Mrs. Dodds had disappeared again. She was now inside the building, at the end of the entrance hall.**

**Okay, I thought. She's going to make me buy a new shirt for Nancy at the gift shop. **

"No! No! What part of monster don't you get!" groaned Nico.

"He wasn't introduced to the gods yet, Nico." Sighed Annabeth.

**But apparently that wasn't the plan.**

"It never is." Poseidon said, sadly.

**I followed her deeper into the museum. When I finally caught up to her, we were back in the Greek and Roman section.**

"Oh, the irony! You get killed by a Greek monster in the Greek and Roman section." Said Connor.

"Connor?" Said Katie, sweetly.

"Yeah?"

"Shut. Up."

**Except for us, the gall ery was empty.**

"No witnesses...for a monster, it sure is smart." Said Travis.

"Travis!" Hissed Katie, glancing at Poseidon.

**Mrs. Dodds stood with her arms crossed in front of a big marble frieze of the Greek gods. She was making this weird noise in her throat, like growling.**

"Probably was."

**Even without the noise, I would've been nervous. It's weird being alone with a teacher, especially Mrs. Dodds. Something about the way she looked at the frieze, as if she wanted to pulverize it…**

"Probably did."

**"You've been giving us problems, honey," she said.**

**I did the safe thing. I said, "Yes, ma'am."**

"Woah! Percy did the safe thing? Mark it down, this is a day we shall never forget." Said Thalia.

**She tugged on the cuffs of her leather jacket. "Did you really think you would get away with it?" The look in her eyes was beyond mad. It was evil.**

"Well, duh. It's. A. Monster!"

"You have 5 seconds to shut up, Stoll."

**She's a teacher, I thought nervously. It's not like she's going to hurt me.**

"Oh, how oblivous you were." Said Connor.

"And still are." Thalia said, glancing at Annabeth.

"Not my fault he couldn't take a hint!"**  
><strong>

**I said, "I'lll-I'll try harder, ma'am."**

**Thunder shook the building.**

**"We are not fools, Percy Jackson," Mrs. Dodds said. "It was only a matter of time before we found you out. Confess, and you will suffer less pain."**

"How appealing."

**I didn't know what she was talking about.**

"Me neither." Said Apollo.

"Apollo, you never know what anyone's talking about."

"Hey! That's mean, sis." Apollo pouted.

**All I could think of was that the teachers must've found the ill egal stash of candy I'd been selling out of my dorm room.**

"Awesome!"

**Or maybe they'd realized I got my essay on Tom Sawyer from the Internet without ever reading the book and now they were going to take away my grade. Or worse, they were going to make me read the book.**

"What?!" Asked an enraged Athena.

"Don't worry, mother. I made him read it."

**"Well?" she demanded.**

**"Ma'am, I don't…"**

**"Your time is up," she hissed.**

Poseidon was clutching his throne.

**Then the weirdest thing happened. Her eyes began to glow like barbecue coals. Her fingers stretched, turning into talons. Her jacket melted into large, leathery wings. She wasn't human. She was a shriveled hag with bat wings and claws and a mouth full of yellow fangs, and she was about to slice me to ribbons.**

"Hades..." Started Poseidon.

"Yes?" Asked Hades timidly.

"YOU SENT A FURY AFTER MY SON? YOU ARE DEAD, YOU ARE SO DEAD. If one hair on his head was harmed in this attack, I will send you to Tartarus."

Hades gluped, knowing Poseidon can follow through on his threat.

**Then things got even stranger.**

"How does it get even mroe stranger?" Asked Katie.

"Welcome to the world of gods." Said Chris.

**Mr. Brunner, who'd been out in front of the museum a minute before, wheeled his chair into the doorway of the gall ery, holding a pen in his hand.**

"A pen? You gonna write on her?" Snorted Ares.

"Well, not exactly. Just three feet of deadly celestial bronze." Said Annabeth.

**"What ho, Percy!" he shouted, and tossed the pen through the air.**

**Mrs. Dodds lunged at me.**

Cracks started to appear on Poseidon's throne.

**With a yelp, I dodged and felt talons slash the air next to my ear. I snatched the ball point pen out of the air, but when it hit my hand, it wasn't a pen anymore. It was a sword-Mr. Brunner's bronze sword, which he always used on tournament day.**

"He used Riptide on tournament day?" Asked Annabeth.

"Daughter, how do you know so much about this Sea Spawn?" Asked Athena.

"All of us have been on the receiving end of the sword in the training arena." Annabeth lied.

**Mrs. Dodds spun toward me with a murderous look in her eyes.**

**My knees were jelly. My hands were shaking so bad I almost dropped the sword.**

Ares opened his mouth to comment.

"Don't comment, Ares." Glared Poseidon.

**She snarled, "Die, honey!"**

Nico snickered.

"What?" Asked everyone else.

"Alecto attacking a jar of honey."

Everyone laughed, but the tension was still there.

**And she flew straight at me.**

Poseidon was hyperventillating, so Annabeth got up and whispered something that instatly calmd Poseidon.

"What did you say?" Asked Katie.

"I just told him that Percy got to camp."

**Absolute terror ran through my body.**

"Wimp!" Cried Ares.

Annabeth smirked. Imagine Ares' reaction when he got beaten by a 12 year old.

**I did the only thing that came naturally:**

"Run?" Laughed Ares.**  
><strong>

**I swung the sword.**

"I bet he missed."

You can guess who said that, again.

**The metal blade hit her shoulder and passed clean through her body as if she were made of water. Hisss!**

"So many water references..." Muttered Nico.

**Mrs. Dodds was a sand castle in a power fan. She exploded into yellow powder, vaporized on the spot, leaving nothing but the smell of sulfur and a dying screech and a chill of evil in the air, as if those two glowing red eyes were still watching me.**

"He defeated a fury on his first swing?" Cried Athena, is disbelief.

"His first monster was a fury?" Asked most of the gods.

"Um. Duh. What did we just read?" Answered the demigods.

**I was alone.**

"The mist." Explained Athena.

**There was a ball point pen in my hands.**

"Again, the Mist."

**Mr. Brunner wasn't there. Nobody was there but me.**

"Nobody..." Snickered Annabeth, and Clarisse.

**My hands were still trembling. My lunch must've been contaminated with magic mushrooms or something.**

"Ooh! Katie can we-" The Stolls started, at the same time Hermes and Apollo said,

"Ooh! Demeter, can you-"

"No!" Came the replies of Katie and Demeter.

They smiled at each other.

**Had I imagined the whole thing?**

"Sadly, no."

**I went back outside.**

**It had started to rain.**

**Grover was sitting by the fountain, a museum map tented over his head. Nancy Bobofit was still standing there, soaked from her swim in the fountain, grumbling to her ugly friends. When she saw me, she said, "I hope Mrs. Kerr whipped your butt."**

"Who?" Asked everyone.

"The Mist." Answered Athena.

**I said, "Who?"**

"No! Percy Syndome has affected everyone! We are doomed!"

The Stolls fake-sobbed into each other's shoulders.

**"Our teacher. Duh!"**

**I blinked. We had no teacher named Mrs. Kerr. I asked Nancy what she was talking about.**

"Me neither."

"How many times do I have to repeat myself, Apollo? The. Mist."

**She just rolled her eyes and turned away.**

**I asked Grover where Mrs. Dodds was.**

**He said, "Who?"**

"Woah, Grover can lie? That's a new one." Exclaimed Thalia.

**But he paused first, and he wouldn't look at me, so I thought he was messing with me.**

"Oh. Never mind then."

"Son! Sign him up for lying classes." Said Hermes.

**"Not funny, man," I told him. "This is serious."**

**Thunder boomed overhead.**

"Apparently, you guys think so too." Said Nico.

**I saw Mr. Brunner sitting under his red umbrella, reading his book, as if he'd never moved.**

**I went over to him.**

**He looked up, a little distracted. "Ah, that would be my pen. Please bring your own writing utensil in the future, Mr. Jackson." I handed Mr. Brunner his pen. I hadn't even realized I was still holding it.**

"Woo! Go Chiron!" Cried the Sons of Hermes.

**"Sir," I said, "where's Mrs. Dodds?"**

"A monster."

**He stared at me blankly. "Who?"**

"Yes! Seriously, learn from Chiron, Grover."

**"The other chaperone. Mrs. Dodds. The pre-algebra teacher."**

**He frowned and sat forward, looking mildly concerned. "Percy, there is no Mrs. Dodds on this trip. As far as I know, there has never been a Mrs. Dodds at Yancy Academy. Are you feeling all right?"**

"Now Chiron can lie!"

"Alright, who's reading next?" Asked Artemis.

"I will." Said Katie, but before she can start, three people came drifitng down from the ceiling, holding umbrellas Mary Poppins style.

"Seriously?" Clarisse snorts. "First smoke bombs and now this?"

"WHO ARE YOU?" Thundered Zeus.

* * *

><p><strong>Woop! Chapter 1 done xD Anyways, QOTC: Favorite book series, or book? <strong>

**IMPORTANT: I'm sorry, this will be a Percabeth story (For all of you who ship Pernico)Nico does deserve to be happy though. HE'S JUST SO PERF-**

**~LeslieeeCx**


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